I Can't Make This Stuff Up

Tuesday afternoon at the lake was quite entertaining. The steamy 90+ air temperature brought swarms of teens to one of the lakes at our local State Park. After my swim buddy Cheryl R. and I geared up and applied heaping amounts of sunscreen, we walked past a group of teens to enter the water. "Are you going to swim across?" one girl asked. "That is the plan," I said. She replied, "I have a phone so I can call 9-1-1" if you need me. "Great, thank you," we said and started swimming. When we returned after our 0.8 mi lap 1, and ran out for a quick feeding, the teens looked puzzled. "Are you going AGAIN?" We nodded. After our 2nd lap, I ran out for a swig of electrolytes and one of the teens asked, "Do either of you smoke cigarettes?" Seriously? I looked at her, and replied, "Remember how we're doing multiple laps... we couldn't do that if we smoked."  Pause. She then said, "That makes sense I guess." I re-entered the water and said, "Remember 9-1-1." What an afternoon. At the far end of the lake, another group of teens were congregating. When I stopped to adjust my goggles after length 5, one of the guys asked, "Dude, is there like a sandbar out there? I heard there was. And if there is, I totally want to go." I looked at him and said, "Yes, there are several." He then asked if when I was swimming overtop of one, I could stop, stand up, and wildly wave my hands over my head and yell back at them. Let me think... you want me to act like I'm drowning in front of a packed lake of beachgoers, while you and your six friends who have probably been drinking, try to swim out and find my sandbar?!
I turned and started swimming back. I can't make this stuff up. Thanks, Cheryl R., for hanging with me!